does this, will any of it, matter in a year from now, and consider, that even if they are wrong, they might be well intentioned, even if they are unable to communicate that.
The truth is a lion. It can defend itself once you set it free.
the past is just a story about someone, it isn't who they are to us, and who they are now. In my very distant past, my ancestors were crusaders and killed Muslims, and long before that, viking invaders. I am glad I am not the past, from ten years ago, or a thousand. Same with other women on the internet people seem to trouble themselves with harassing their blogs and other social media as if almost, they were obsessed with something that doesn't affect them now, or maybe never did.
"Love me or hate me, both are in my favor. If you love me, I shall always be in your heart. If you hate me, shall always be in your mind".
I am still having trouble forgiving some people (well, a single person really) still, however I have no desire to have an obsession with them, I want them out of my head you know?
Doing this is easier said than done, but I find, the best advice is, instead of being right, care about being kind.
An old Arabic proverb advises, "the mouth should have three gatekeepers: Is it true? Is it kind? Is it necessary?"
If we kept this advice there would be little wrong we could do even online.
rememeber that mean ignorant or stupid people are not my job to educate: I am not the jackass whisperer.
Ali, the Prophet's nephew, said that silence is sometimes the most eloquent reply. I agree. Have difficulty doing this, but he was right and remains right.
And in Islam, being able to forgive is tantamount to having a means access God/Allah's mercy.
There was a girl who was my roomate. She stole, she lied. She owed me money. In the end, I was like, let her keep it, I just don't want to deal with her anymore. She was all like, thank you, at the same time, lying to other people saying it was her I owed money to [even though I have a signed piece of paper from her saying exactly how much she owed me]. Then a few months later I get myself back on the career path, I have new friends, I will get married soon, she calls me up and acts all friendly. What has happened? She lost her job and she wants to use my connections to find a new job.
All I know is, I didn't do it, and will always have to wonder. It wasn't vengeance exactly, but it wasn't kindness either. It wasn't the brave thing to do, or the best.
The past (even other peoples' mistakes in their own lives) should make us better, not bitter. I kind of find it pointless to use someone's past against them if they have already changed, if it would not make them better, and if it would not make me myself better as a human being before God/Allah, not anyone else in this world.
I mean, it is one thing to learn from one's own mistakes. That's what a smart person does. But a wise person? They learn from the mistakes of others'.
the people with the best advice once upon a time had the most problems. And an old Irish proverb states: "the truth does not change, whether it arrived late, or on the back of a liar. What is right remains right, and what is wrong, remains wicked, whoever and however the message is delivered, and when that message comes to your door."
So why does someone's current life, and what they advise, matter in terms of their past, which is gone and no more? And even, if unchanged, cannot help you or me to become a better person for saying anything against?
I took my daughter to see the new live action Cinderella movie over the last weekend. I liked the idea they were representing, of Cinderella being a superheroe, and that kindness and courage were superpowers.
They are really.
Islam says the kindness is incumbent upon the true believer.
So now, from now on, I should probably say nothing about that person I still haven't forgiven until I forgive them, because even it is true what I say, it does not make me better, and it is not kind.
Leave the past to be summed up as, lessons learnt, and good memories, and tha'st it. Carry nothing else with you. Life is heavy enough, as it is, without anger, self-rightious indignation, and incessant lost causes. This post is addressed to me first, before anyone else.