Wednesday, May 14, 2014

MARRIAGE LAWS IN OMAN: convincing the family to allow an Omani woman to marry an expatriate

In Islam it doesn't matter whose family, what tribe, or nation, a man is from, if he wants to marry a
Muslim woman, but you have NO IDEA how difficult this may be for Omani women to convince their families (and namely fathers) of:

The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “If there comes to you to marry (your daughter) one who with whose religious commitment and character you are pleased, then marry (your daughter) to him, for if you do not do that, there will be fitnah (tribulation) in the land and widespread corruption.” Narrated by al-Tirmidhi, 1084; classed as hasan by al-Albaani in Saheeh al-Tirmidhi, 866.

It says in Tuhfat al-Ahwadhi: The phrase “if there comes to you to marry (your daughter)” means if he comes to ask to marry a woman from among your children or relatives. “One with (whom) … you are pleased” means you think well of him, and are pleased with his religious commitment. “His character” means his attitude and how he deals and interacts with others. “Then marry (your daughter) to him, for if you do not do that” means, if you do not marry (your daughter) to one with whose religious commitment and character you are pleased, and you are only concerned with lineage, beauty and wealth, “there will be fitnah (tribulation) in the land and widespread corruption” i.e., great corruption, because if you will only marry her to someone who is wealthy or of high status, most of your womenfolk may remain without husbands, and most of your men will remain without wives, so there will be a lot of temptation to commit zina, and perhaps the guardians may feel that their honour has been violated (because of zina), so there will be a lot of tribulation and corruption, which will result in illegitimacy and a lack of righteousness and chastity.

Of course, in Oman, it is easy to dismiss, since the country actually makes illegal what is "halal/lawful" in Islam, which the Qu'ran says:

"Say 'who has made Unlawful (Haram) the luxuries that God has provided his servants and the good things?..." (7/32)

"Say 'Do you see that which God has provided for you, you make some of it Unlawful (Haram) and some of it Lawful (Halal)? Say 'Did God allow you to do this? Or do you tell lies about God?" (10/59)

"And do not say lies for what your tongues describes: this is lawful (HALAL), and that is unlawful (HARAM), to lie about God. Those who lie about God will never succeed. They will have small pleasures (on Earth), AND FOR THEM IS A PAINFUL RETRIBUTION" (16/116-117)

And of races, nations, and tribes, the Qu'ran says:
"O Mankind, ...we made you into tribes and nations so that you may know each other (not that you despise each other). Verily, the most honoured of you in the sight of Allah is he who is most righteous of you." (Al-Quran, Chapter 49, Verse 13)

"And amongst his signs is the creation of heaven and the earth, and variation in your language and colours; Verily, in there are signs for those who know" (Al-Quran, Chapter 30, Verse 22)

The Prophet Mohammed said of men who would judge one man to be a superior of another: "An Arab is no better than a non-Arab, and you are no better than a red skinned person nor a black .But he who is superior is he who has fear/remembrance of God in his/her heart"

For myself, that is enough to know, that whoever asks to marry my daughter, if she is willing of course, if he is good man, a kind man, a patient man, and a man who fears and remembers God/Allah, then we will say yes, no matter the difficulties of cross culture or even the same culture;).

However, I will try to attach here to this post, a fatwa from the Grand Mufti saying as much (I know he's already given some but I can't find it right now). Anyways, this post is in response to a couple emails I get every month asking me if I have anything on this.

1 comment:

Muslimah Delights said...

If only life was as simple as Islam made it! People cause so much hardship and suffering in the name of culture/traditions etc.