Sunday, August 15, 2010

Female Circumcision in Oman

I wanted to write about something I just learnt about.

I had honestly never thought it was a big issue here in Oman and I know some "Bedu" stock families for have waaaay weird traditions and it never came up. They themselves always went, "not Omanis."

Of all the Omani I know, and I know alot, none have ever practiced it, but now there are about three women of my aquaintance who had female circumcision (the tip---very small ammount--- of the clitoris is removed from the vagina in this operation---it is NOT the same as the African one which is more like female genital mutilation and all is cut out and then closed and makes giving birth to children difficult) and WHO actually advocated it. I was shocked, plainly, as I am posting on the subject.

But it exists here, and I guess Reality posted on it a while back because when I googled it her post came up. But really, it is only recently I heard about it.

****It is a cultural practice neither advocated or condemned by Islam---and is something outside the Islamic religion, incase you didn't know, because, in case you are curious like the customs guy at the US border, I myself am not circumcised, and am most definately Muslim****.
Customs Tool: "OPNO, do you have anything to declare?"
OPNO: "No."
Customs Tool [looks at my passport]: "You can't be a Muslim. Your eyes are blue."
OPNO: "Religion is not the same thing as a 'race'.'" [the last time I made a joke, I was in a room for 3 hours/ which is MAYBE why they give me a hard time now]
Customs Tool: "So... If you are Muslim does that mean you are circumcised?"
OPNO [give him a 'what the hell?!' kind of expression]: "No. Does this have anything to do with customs, not my 'customs' but US customs?"
Customs Tool: "." [looks like a dear caught in the headlights]
OPNO: "I will answer the following, 'Business or pleasure, no, I have no currency over such and such ammount, my address is such and such hotel, and circumcision has nothing to do with the Muslim's religion."
I am a bit mouthy. A friend, we'll call her L, does not like traveling with me. Moral of useless commentary documenting why I don't like US customs (even alot of American don't!:D) is the fact that people have a misconception the custom is tied to our religion. It is not.
Back to circumcision in Oman.
One woman I know from Dakliyah near Nizwa had it done, and went to take her 1 and half year old daughter to have it done. As the heat in Oman can make a woman more sexually aroused, some women advocate the practice. But it does make a woman less sexually stimulated during marriage. Which this woman's husband admitted when I investigated, he'd in general prefer a woman who wanted sex more that two times a week, and didn't find such a thing intimidating in the slightest.

As an unmarried, uncircumcised woman, I myself can admit, yes, sometimes it is a pain, but the potential for being a better match for a man I might someday meet and marry in that regard? I don't want to give that up LOL!

As with the other two women I know who had it done and who were doing it to their daughters, it was actually their father who put an end to the practice within the family when their baby girl had an issue, when she'd cry when she had to urinate, as it got a little infected (most of the circumcisions done in Oman are done very hygenically BTW, not that I wanted to witness them) but the grandfather FREAKED on the women and threatened to divorce Baby girl's grandmother if it was done to another little girl.
Some Omani women admit it is part of their family culture and prefer it for their baby daughters, most Omani men I asked, would 100% rather their future wife be more sexually stimu-late-able [fun making up words].
For the Omani girls, feel free to post anonymously, is it common in your families? Do you prefer it? Do you think no way you'd want it for your daughters, and for the women who prefer it, what do the men in your family think? [ha ha, I know you won't be brave enough to ask them, that's why I already did].


IamSilla said...

i had it! hehe but my other sisters didnt. my brother will be circumcise later. in malaysia the boys will be circumcise around 9-12 years old. the girls when they r still a baby but its not a must (i think)

PhantomX said...

Although I'm not a girl, I'd like to post my input.When i get married i will make sure my wife isn't circumcised. Hell, i wouldn't feel embarassed to ask her parents.I mean, I'm going to live with this girl for the rest of my life.. I don't want a girl to sit there like a rock while we have intercourse and not feel anything.. it would be strange and awkward.
Is it common in your families?

A)Never was, never will be.. God created a female this way. I mean why bother? It's cruelty.. It gives the girl psychological problems.. All in all, i find female circumcision strange and unnormal and people who perform this act are sick in the head period

Anonymous said...

Yes its common in my family. And I hate it.

I thought my parents are well educated and will never do that to their daughters. I was shocked that they did it, even to me, lol.

My mother thinks its Islamic. you cant argue with her about it.

Omani Princess (not Omani LOL) said...

Anon 10:54: The hadith used to support female circumcision actually is against the kind practiced in Africa, as it states do not take the whole clitoris out. It actually DOES NOT encourage taking any of it, as the practice existed before Islam, it only did not say it was haraam. Like getting one's ear's pierced ect. The hadith about peircings forbids getting more than one hole in the ears but it does not say to actually GET holes in the ear. I'd say that doesn't make it an Islamic practice. What would make it an Islamic practice is if it were praised or suggested for us, or if it was practiced by the Prophet's wives ect on their children after they were in Islam.

LOL, I would ARGUE, using fiqh and daleel.

Omani Princess (not Omani LOL) said...

IamSilla: Yes, it is common around the world, more than I'd thought I suppose.

Omani Princess (not Omani LOL) said...

PhantomX: Thank you for confirming what I believe is the feelings of most Omani men I spoke to, at least in regards to their wives.

Sakeenah said...

the only thing i have heard about female circumcision that doesn't make me want to vomit was the removal of the hood of the clitoris as you could say its like a "foreskin" and things can get up under there somehow and an infection can occur. it is also a popular procedure with many cosmetic surgeons in the west so its easy enough to get it done in a very clean environment. that being said would i send my daughter to get it done? ABSOLUTELY NOT.

as for any removal of the clitoris its self i mentioned this to my husband recently who had no idea that such things were even preformed. i cant even describe the disgust on his face he was horrified and said "what man would want that?" he is right, what man would want to have sex with a woman who is unable to enjoy sex with him and have her just lay there until he was done be cause she has little to no sexual desire.

Omani Princess (not Omani LOL) said...

Sakeenah:Exactly! What man would?

Anonymous said...

I feel so sorry for women who has went through that. And their future husbands.. How it is possible that women still agree to this kind of operation??? Because the heat??? OMG. This sounds so crazy, I don't know what to say. Poor people..

Anonymous said...

It's a more of a cultural issue than a religious one. Am totally against FGM. It's widely (or maybe not so much nowadays) practised in the middle-east, africa and some parts of Asia. sf

Anonymous said...

I live in Africa and it's pretty hot and makes me exausted and drained rather than sexually excited???the heat kills you not turns you on???plus if a Muslim girl is raised in a pious environment is told to be pious to wear hijab,lower her gaze not mix with men not to talk to men unecesserely (flirt) stay in her house,read Qu'ran, Fast well I am pretty sure she will be 'able to control' herself and I haven't yet seen any women running around wild jumping on men??it is actually the opposite in any culture men who are the ones who are sexually forward and perverted....they run after anything that moves, and some even become excited on seeing nikabi women???? of course to marry girl young not wait until she is 28*30 that she can finish her 'education' and by young I don't mean 12 ok! we don't need cultural practises we need to stick to the Qu'ran and Sunnah and everything will be ok, and men really need to control themselves not the other way round!