Monday, June 28, 2010

This is for the Omani Readers: the ban on marrying foreigners, your thoughts, and mine

So, if all the Oman blogs could put this out, simply because I am curious for both female and male Omani opinions on the matter, what do Omanis think about lifting the ban on marrying foreigners? I have a poll on the sidebar and wish you’d vote, if you are Omani, because this issue has long affecteded me and my friends (both foreign and Omani).

Right now, as is, unless you have some wasta, marriage to a foreigner requires a few things under Omani law. For an Omani man to marry a non-Omani woman it isn't allowed unless he is has been divorced a few times with children, he is mentally or physically disabled, or he’s over forty. For an Omani woman, if she’s divorced or widowed with children they make exceptions, same if she is mentally or physically disabled.

While one friend TRIED to tempt me with their handsome Omani friend who is quite disturbed and pocessed by an evil Jinn [I think Oman law would totally allow the marriage based on the insanity clause] I kinda held out. I don’t like evil Jinn. It’s kinda a personal thing. Just NOT attracted to creepy scary things that talk to me in demon voices. Yeah. LOL.

Anyways, here are my thoughts. I am a Muslim. In Islam, making something unlawful that Allah made lawful for mankind is ACTUALLY a form of shirk (disbelief in Allah), the kind of shirk the Qu’ran says committed by Jewish and Christian priests in different periods of history. So I don’t think there should be a law saying which country an Omani man or woman can marry from. Kinda because it is shirk, though I DO know the merits of why such a ban was proposed in Oman.

I think the ban should be lifted. But with conditions to preserve the unique culture of Oman:

Conditions being, to preserve the moral culture of Oman, Omani women should only be able to marry Muslim men. This is also in Islamic law. The men should be able to prove they can provide for the woman and be able to fit into her family if they are going to stay and live in Oman.

For Omani men, they should be able to marry Muslim, Christian, or Jewish foreign women, as this is what the Qu'ran says. But it is says ****PRACTICING**** Jewish and Christian women [of which, few will agree to marry a Muslim, because I HAVE practicing Christian and Jewish friends and most don't their kids to be raised Muslims]. So that stripper from Thailand? She doesn't COUNT as a practicing Christian my darling Omani boys. You don't want a bunch of immoral European, Asian, and Western women married to Omani men (as fun as that sounds boys LOL) but it'll totally ruin the culture of your children. In addition to that, Christian or Jewish women would have to sign a clause saying they would allow their children to be raised as Muslims and that their holidays would be celebrated outside of the home without the involvement of their children. [I added this for you PhantomX, cuz that is a valid point, as a Muslim with non-Muslim relatives this is something I will have to enforce when I have children].

These are my rather simple thoughts on the matter. I love Oman, I love the Sultan, and generally love how Islam is practiced here by the Gov.. This is one exeption to that love. I wonder what you all think. If on other blogs, please repost my poll for your Omani readers so they can participate. Thanks!

Story # 1 that inspired this post: http://howtolivelikeanomaniprincess.blogspot.com/2010/07/one-opnos-list-of-how-to-marry-omani.html

20 comments:

Anonymous said...

I agree with you Princess :P But I'd prefer to marry a Muslim girl considering the fact that we have something in common.. Marrying a Christian or Jew would lead to complications depending on how religous she is.. Christians believing that Jesus is the son of God or celebrating Hannukah.. i don't buy that..
What about the children? Should they be Muslim or Christian? Therefore, Men should only marry Muslim women period.. oh and that story about the handsome guy possessed by an evil jinn made me laugh :D

PhantomX

Omani Princess (not Omani LOL) said...

PhantomX: In Islam it is generally a rule for Muslim men only to marry Jewish or Christian women IF at war ect, or there are no Muslim women available, so I agree with you. But I would never want a law to make something unlawful Allah SWT said is halal:D so that is why I say yes with some conditions. But I am not an Omani woman. Of which many say, other women will steal our men. My answer to that: not if you lower your bloody HIGH MAHERS and gold requests, DUUUUUUUUUUUHHHHHHH! Of course that British woman or Moroccan chic are easier to marry. because their families are demanding 9000 rials and a ballroom and two cars and a trunk of gold ect.

Anonymous said...

my father is omani, and my mother is australian. i dont think there is a problem, love has no boundaries

Non-Crowned Princess said...

With some conditions, yes. I want to marry a Japanese guy, but there is a study that says Japanese husbands are the worst on earth. That's why I forgot about them and moved to Korean guys.

I'm sure you know I'm not serious here =p But the study is true.

And I voted "Yes, 100%, Islam says what.." not the with conditions option.

Omani Princess (not Omani LOL) said...

Anon: I agree @ love knows no borders or countries.

Sigh. One of the girls in the OPNO trio loved an Omani man once and he couldn't get permission to marry her. In the music playlist, lol (time heals all wounds, or at least distracts us from them) you can guess which songs are theirs.

Omani Princess (not Omani LOL) said...

Non-crowned princess: Ahhhh, Korean guys are so sweet (majority I have known), and they have arranged marriages like us Omanis XD

I know an Arab girl who has a half-Korean son and the boy is just so cute MashaAllah tabarakallah.

Suburban said...

I don't think it's the job of the Government to tell me who I may and May not marry. There should be a Secular option for government sanctioned marriages.

It is a Human rights issue, in that I should be free to marry anyone I choose, without governmental meddling. There should be no governmental restrictions whatsoever regardless of nationality or religion.

Omani Princess (not Omani LOL) said...

Suburban: I agree with you in the cases of non-Muslim Omanis (which some people are through naturalization).

I guess because I am Muslim I am prejudiced in the direction i want Oman to go, lol, I don't want it to leave any aspect of the human rights lain out in Shariah. To me Shariah trumps human rights in all cases. Universal Human rights lain out by the UN are not always universal (as my non_muslim aidworker friends would attest from long experience).

After this for Omanis ONLY poll (which assumed on the bias that Omani citizens are Muslims) I will make a general public poll and include the option you suggested there. Thank you for bringing this to my attention and sorry for my bias!

Umm Qahtan said...

AS SALAM ALAIKUM SHEIKHA.

I think what the problem is .. the government are not practising Islam, they are practising Nationalism & it this antionalism thats drummed into kids from the first day they go to school, the flag, the antham, the standing for certain peoples..its all anti islamic but yet no one really seems to care that their kids have and are being brain washed and adults who have grown with it usually love it so much they dnt realise its shirk. I for sue wont allow my British-Omani son to stand for either antham..he is only 7 months old mashAllah but as soon as i hear the radio from uscat play the antham i instruct my hubby to turn it off asap. Islam is above nationalism and culture, i hope inshaAllah peple will realise that because its destroying our ummah and displeasing Allah Swt.

Ill conitnue this in my blogg with a post wth daleel from Quran and sunnah so as i dont flood ur comments section.

Love u sis & im glad u have spoken up about such topics. BarakAllah fech ameen. xox

Omani Princess (not Omani LOL) said...

Love you too Umm Qahtan!

Anonymous said...

Im Omani
I agree with the ban as i see it as protection to people from themselves and for the sake of their kids.

i believe the country has good & wise regulations for people who dont fit under what you called "ban"

note: my sis , family members and another few friends of mine are in fact happily married to expats in Oman and it was done WITHOUT Wasta. I happen to have strong faith on gods will and the good for humans.

Omani Princess (not Omani LOL) said...

Anonymous: I agree, it is a protection of sorts, against the immigration of peoples whose values you might not agree with. All the expats I know married to Omanis will admit it was done with wasta. All of them are Muslims.

But if you have faith in God's will for the good of human's, Allah did not make such a ban for humans. He said Muslim men and women could marry of other countries and nations. Such a law is actually a form of shirk, as it makes unlawful what Allah Himself made lawful.

Omani Princess (not Omani LOL) said...

*unlawful to make unlawful what Allah SWT said was halal.

AmasE°♥ said...

gr8 post...
I voted for "with conditions" why??? only to regulate the marriage that's it... some of my families (men) are married from other nationalities and they r sooooooo happy al7amdullaAllah....

conditions: I think "age" is the condition (-18 cannot)... u might say under 18 and want to marry from outside, yeaaaaaaaah we r in Oman and i've seen some cases b4...
Thanx for ur post princess... i have to go back to my work now....

akrasia said...

Although I am not Omani I have some experience of the issue as my daughter is married to an Omani. I am therefore confused by your wish for a ban on Omani's marrying foreigners to be lifted. My experience is of a protracted and arduous process that began with outright rejection, included many and repeated disappointments and finally ended with permission being granted. Oman is of course in no way unique in having such a policy and at all times I felt the Omani authorities acted with as much concern for my daughter's interests as for any Omani based interests. For that reason I can only be grateful to them.

Omani Princess (not Omani LOL) said...

akrasia: it is an unislamic law that is why I don't like it.

I want it lifted for that reason. I understand some people see it as sensible. I don't know that alot of countries have such a law. saudia arabia does and Oman, but not many others, and not my country.

Omani Princess (not Omani LOL) said...

Amase: oh I agree, legal age sould be important. In my country it is 18, and in the USA it is 21 I think????

18 is adulthood to the united nations. I still think that CAN IN SOME CASES be young to undrestand the trials of a multi-cultural marriage but some are mature enough for it, I know 2 cases.

Sungirl said...

I would love to contribute to the non omani poll. It would be interesting to see what you find out from it.:)Thanks for sharing.

AR said...

Hi... I wanna ask... Im not omani, BUT i have relationship with omani... We in the hard situation...we confuse about married because the culture of oman that not allow married with outside people (non omani) we fall in love , almost 4years...its hard to continue and most hard to finish this relationship...any opinions for me...keep survive and continue this relationship ( fighting for love) OR better we finish and try to forget each other (its hard to say goodbye) ...

AR said...

Hi... I wanna ask... Im not omani, BUT i have relationship with omani... We in the hard situation...we confuse about married because the culture of oman that not allow married with outside people (non omani) we fall in love , almost 4years...its hard to continue and most hard to finish this relationship...any opinions for me...keep survive and continue this relationship ( fighting for love) OR better we finish and try to forget each other (its hard to say goodbye) ...